An Almighty Alternative

"...hear his voice..."

I came across a couple paragraphs on self-image while I was clearing out some files while preparing for the new school year. Somewhere along the line, someone thought I would be interested in the content. I was, and so now I pass some of it along to you. (Unfortunately, there was no source attached to the paragraphs.)

“The beliefs we have about ourselves were formed in the past. All of our experiences, successes, failures, embarrassments, victories, and relationships with others have helped shape our self-images. Once this image is planted in our brains, we see it as being completely true. We don’t ask ourselves whether our self-image is false or not. We accept it as the absolute truth without asking questions.

Each of us, from the beginning of childhood, weaves a fine web of self-images that grows from our ideas, our parent’s comments to us, and the comment of our teachers and friends. These self-images begin as flimsy cobwebs that become stronger over time, like steel cables. They can support us and make us strong, or they can weigh us down like a ball and chain. All self-images can be changed though. The power of suggestion can have a very strong effect on us. Remember: It’s not what you are that holds you back; it’s what you think you are.”

Our past experiences contribute to our collective self-perception (how we view ourselves). Included in this collection is a narrative of voices that have judged us, criticized us, coddled us, praised us, limited us, rejected us, encouraged us, and loved us. This combined voice continues to speak to us subtly but strongly, often affecting how we live our life and the decisions we make. Someone whose compiled voice tells them they are weak and insignificant will live very differently than someone who lives under the influence of a voice telling them that they are capable and strong. I see these voices at play in the lives of my students and friends constantly.

I see it in my own life.

I often wonder about what my voice adds to people’s collective self-perception. Knowing that the tongue has both the power to give life and destroy it, shouldn’t we be more aware of the significance of our contribution to people’s lives? Every day, we have the opportunity to add life through positive affirmation and hopeful, constructive dialogue. The augmentation of our voice can tilt the scale from self-doubt to self-confidence, self-hatred to self-respect, indifference to motivation.

At some point, we all need the Voice of God and His truth about us interjected into our lives to correct the slanted inaccuracies of a very vocal world. Knowing the truth of our identity as His beloved has a way of erasing the toll taken on us by those who would mislead us about who we really are. It reminds us to participate in the love of God and offer others an almighty alternative to what they believe about themselves.

The challenge for us is to move beyond our neutral silence and engage the neighbor, the student, the friend, the spouse in meaningful conversation, moving beyond shallow-sounding clichés and into relevant relationship. Our aim shouldn’t be to pamper people with bluffing accolades but to simply bring a little life, a little hope.

A small rudder can turn a big ship.

Involved

"Tell me and I forget;

show me and I remember;

involve me and I understand."

Bridge

Four-Wheeled Sanctuary

Somewhere on the American road.

With limited vacation time allowed to me this year, I decided to spread my time out over a series of three and four day weekends in order to take a series of road trips across parts of the American west I had yet to see. Each trip has been as different as the people I have asked to go with me. I explored Mexican-America with Brenda, Native America with Sput, and weird and wonderful America with our extended family. My latest escapade took me far north to wild America with my friend Jon.

Our extended weekend on the road began with a 14-hour drive to Glacier National Park in northern Montana. Glacier is one of America's pristine wilderness areas full of ice-carved peaks, sweeping valleys, impressive wildlife and wildflowers that set the place on fire. It's all a very spectacular and brilliant sight -- one that I have to admit, stirs my soul. Like most of these road trips, however, they are just a great excuse, really, to spend time with the people I love. As impressive as Glacier is, the park wasn't the highlight. The time with my friend was.

I guess that's one of the most appealing aspects of the classic American road trip. The destinations are always great, but the destination isn't necessarily the point. They journey to get there and who you share it with is.

Some might say that driving 2,000 miles in four days plus the wear and tear on the truck combined with the expense of gas isn't really worth it. Were it simply a matter of economics, that might be a valid point. I'll accept that such a trip is ridiculous, but I am more than happy to go well out of my way for time with a friend, family, or neighbor. Do we really need to justify the time, effort, or money that goes into these relationships?

While on the road, Jon suggested that we read aloud the book "The Shack" written by William Young. This book had been recommended to me on many occasions by friends and others who thought that I would appreciate its message. One of the unanticipated delights of this road trip was all the conversation that spun from what we were reading. Our discussions on the goodness of God, the nature of the God-head, and living in loving relationship with the Father and each other consumed the miles. At times, these two grown men were cruising down the interstate at 75(ish) miles an hour fighting back tears and choking on the words we were attempting to read.

It was sloppy. It was funny. It was good for us.

It seemed as though the story on paper was confirming so much of the story unfolding in our lives and how we enjoy the presence of God. Our conversation was rich and deep, something we both crave. He'd laugh whenever I would respond to a poignant message with a short, muffled "hmm" that indicated something hit home. I grinned to myself when I heard him do the same. Like the little child with a bedtime story, we wanted to hear more each time a chapter ended.

We were two men joined by a Third in our four-wheeled sanctuary.

Our road trip ended back where it started at 2300 Poplar Street. We were exausted but thankful that God had orchestrated our meeting five years ago and had built a friendship that was mutually-serving, honest, challenging, and fun. As impressive as Glacier was, it was relationship that delighted me the most. As I glanced over an awesome and inspiring creation, I was reminded that above everything else God put his hand to -- as impressive as His creation is -- it is His relationship with people that He delights in the most.

It's good to have Him as a friend. And just like the road, I'm sure the destination will be great, but I'm enjoying the getting there.

Neighborhood

# & $

The measure of a church?

There can be no doubt that church, as we have understood it, is changing. One of the changes that I am most encouraged by is how we measure growth and success. Traditional paradigms for church success have usually been measured by the following questions:

How much?

How many?

How often?

Church growth proponents and others have long suggested that a healthy church is a growing church (with a large budget). "Growth", of course, seems to be focused on growing our numbers rather than growing our people. Like many others, you may have visited a large church only to discover very little Christian maturity or community ministry coming from the masses. On the other hand, I have visited many small congregations whose maturity and presence were mighty despite their small numbers. Personally, I am most encouraged by the increasing presence of small communities of believers who are embedding themselves in the culture and are serving the communities of our nation in the love of Christ.

I can't help but wonder what is our real aim for "growth" in the Kingdom of God or whose kingdom we are interested in growing. Bigger crowds mean bigger offerings which mean bigger budgets which mean bigger programs and buildings which, in turn, means that we can reach more people (so they say). I see the logic, but I am not so certain the logic is flawless.

If our model is always "growth", we're going to fail. It's inevitable. We can't always grow. Like our present economy, after years of rapid growth, there was an almost obligatory decline (and correction) in the economy. The toll on churches whose measure of success is increasing numbers and growing budgets is calamitous when they begin to decline. Ever-shrinking numbers carry the burden of excessive bugdet deficits and building debt, not to mention the general sense of failure and malaise that accompanies these churches who live in the memory of the "glory days" and struggle to cope with the finacial pressure.

I am not so sure this represents the vitality of God's people living in God's purpose on earth.

I have served in churches whose numbers were declining and whose budgets were strained... and witnessed the stress and anxiety and grief it caused. I've lost a church job because of budget cuts and had to leave our ministry in Ireland because the money wasn't there. I have personally felt the sting. In the pain (and frustration), I have thought a great deal about how dependent so much ministry is upon numbers and dollars...and it has caused me to re-evaluate what I consider ministry to be and how determined I am that we are not so limited when the mammon doesn't come.

I wonder just how much of our emphasis (and security) on church growth is the product of growing up under the influence of capitalism and consumerism. I'm not mocking our American system, but the idea that bigger is better is more of a societal expectation than it is a biblical one.

I work for an organization that thrives on "meeting numbers" and "measuring growth". I must admit that numerical growth has never really meant much to me. I have always delighted in the individual and have thrived in the one-on-one, small group, and changed life. I find reward in telling the stories of my students and friends who have overcome great odds and have discovered life in Christ. I measure success by those who are walking with their God and in the footsteps of Jesus, those who are serving across the globe and right next door with tangible expressions of the love of God. I love the people who fill my life and see them all as a gift from God and a life to be celebrated (Christian or not).

I am just not sure that "how much?", "how many?", and "how often?" can adequately measure the important things in the Kingdom of God or adequately relate what constitutes "success". Success, I believe, is measured differently than what we may be used to or what our traditions may allow.

"You say, 'I am rich; I have acquired wealth and do not need a thing. But you do not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind, and naked.'" (Revelation 3:17)

Mercy & Truth

Alien

Pulled Over

40 in a 30.

So my wife comes up to me today as I am heading into the bathroom and says, "I have a confession to make." Instantly, I saw dollar signs, figuring that whatever was going to come out of her mouth next was surely going to cost me! She proceeded to tell me that she got pulled over on Thursday for going 40 in a 30 and that we would be making a $110 contribution to the city of Denver.

I'm not sure what reaction she expected from me, but given my tendency to over-react to unexpected expenses and her three-day delay in delivering the news, I am sure she expected a little bit of drama.

There was none.

On the contrary, as I climbed into the shower, I was reminded of how often I have deserved a speeding ticket for my heavy foot. On the three occasions that I have been pulled over for speeding, I was only given a warning...and I'm fairly certain it wasn't my pretty face that got me off. What kind of man would I be to get angry with my wife for getting caught doing what I do all the time?

There was no stone throwing in my house today. There was no one qualified to throw one.

That's just one of the many lovely things about Christ. He identified with sinners rather than condemned them. He offered them another Way to live, but he did not use his status as Lord to damn or chide. The only one who was qualified to throw a stone chose not to, and he used an encounter with an adulterous woman to drive the point home that none of us can rightfully throw a stone at another. We are all just as guilty.

For the record, my wife told me I could share the story of her traffic ticket under the condition that I inform everyone that the last ticket she got was in 1988 -- and that one was for crossing the double yellow line. Brenda is, indeed, a great driver (and a great sport for letting me use her story!).